Sarah vs the sisters
by Kate McK
Summary: A short story of Sarah's sisters that makes no sense.  You were warned.


**Sarah vs the sisters**

A/N – Okay, so my mood is all over the place. Tried to get drunk on brandy balls, but they tasted awful so I had a pint of sugar-free ('cause I don't read labels) fudge ice-cream instead. Now I need you to open your mind really wide before reading this. It's crazy, wacky, zany...yadayadayada. Disclaimers and further explanation to follow at the bottom – don't wanna spoil it.

* * *

It was one of their agreed 'quiet' nights. Chuck was lying on his side, facing away from Sarah who was staring at the ceiling. She let out a little sigh. "Chuck, are you awake?"

Chuck briefly considered feigning sleep, remembering what happened a few nights ago, but that would be lying and they had rules. No lies and no secrets. He turned around slowly. "Yeah, what's on your mind?"

Sarah turned towards Chuck, lifting her head slightly to allow him to slip his arm under her neck before nestling into him. Chuck smiled. Looked like he was getting an extra night of cuddling this week.

"I want to tell you about my family."

"Okay." She was constantly surprising him these days. "That will be nice."

"Uhm, actually I have no idea where to start," Sarah confessed.

"Do you want me to ask questions and then you can answer them if you're comfortable?"

Sarah nodded. "That could work." She loved how Chuck was always looking out for her. He knew she found it difficult to talk about her past and he was doing everything he could to make it easier. "Ask away."

"Okay," Chuck said again and thought for a moment. He already knew about her dad. Given where he was on the whole 'mother situation' at the moment, he didn't want to start with that. "Do you have siblings?"

"Yeah," Sarah answered. "I have sisters."

"As in plural?"

"Yes. Three of them."

"Wow, and you are what...the oldest...the youngest...somewhere in the middle?"

"Somewhere in the middle. I have one older sister and two younger ones."

"Are you all knockout blondes?"

Sarah blushed lightly. "Yes, we are. Right down to the blue eyes." She smacked Chuck's chest playfully.

"Do you wanna tell me about them?"

"Okay. I suppose I should start with the oldest and work my way down."

"Makes sense. What's her name?"

"Mary. She lives in Albuquerque. I'll tell you about her job, but it's kind of classified, so you have to keep it to yourself, okay?"

"My lips are sealed, but how do you know? I thought we're supposed to keep classified jobs from family as well?"

"Normally, but I had to make use of her services once and we stumbled onto what the other really did for a living."

"So she's a government agent too?"

"Yes, a US Marshall. The family thinks she's just some messenger for the government, but she's actually responsible for putting people in the witness protection programme and keeping an eye on them. The cops refer to them as the branch of law enforcement that puts criminals back on the streets."

"What do you think?"

"I think it's great that they protect the innocent bystanders that just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. As for the criminals...I guess letting a little fish go to fry the big one is justified."

"So is it dangerous?"

"Sometimes. Mary had her share of being shot at. Her partner was actually hit once."

"Did he make it?"

"Yes, Marshall is just fine."

"Hang on. Her partner's name is Marshall?"

"Yeah, why?"

"So he's like...Marshall Marshall?" Sarah snickered.

"Yes, Chuck. Sometimes life's just that way."

Chuck snorted. "Suddenly Morgan's cover name doesn't seem so bad."

"What's his cover name?"

"Michael Carmichael."

Sarah burst out laughing. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, but we're getting off track here. Any chance that there's something going on between Marshall Mary and Marshall Marshall?"

"I think there might be. They're very protective of each other and not just in a partnership kind of way. And they're best friends."

"So have they ever crossed the line?"

"Not from what I can tell. Mary has this on and off relationship with some baseball player."

"Poor Marshall Marshall."

"Chuck, stop calling him that."

"Sorry. So that's Mary's story?"

"In a nutshell."

"Okay, so who's next?"

"Brandi. The black sheep."

"Uh-oh, what did Brandi do?"

"What hasn't Brandi done? She's not really the sharpest pencil in the box."

"Sarah, that's not a very nice thing to say about your sister."

"I know, I'm sorry, but she can't light a match without instructions."

"Sarah!"

"I'm not trying to be mean, it's just...Brandi has this knack of getting involved with the wrong people. She's a trouble magnet, always involved in some kind of scheme. It's like she can't get any direction in her life."

"So where is she now?"

"Actually, she's living with Mary at the moment."

"And Mary is trying to whip her butt into shape?"

"Hers and Mom's, but my mother is a totally different story."

"Are Mary and Brandi close?"

"It's difficult to tell with those two. The fact that Brandi is somehow involved with Raphael doesn't help matters either."

"Raphael?"

"Mary's baseball player."

"Oh, right. That's a bad move."

"Yeah, but despite everything, Mary has a big heart. She'll do anything for her sisters."

"I have a feeling you would too."

"Of course. But I'm glad Mary's the one dealing with Brandi. I might have killed her a long time ago."

"So what's your job?"

"I keep an eye on our baby sister."

"How do you do that with the whole moving around and missions in different countries?"

"Well, she only moved out on her own shortly after this mission started and as luck would have it, she's living here in LA."

"Let me guess, she came here to become an actress, but she hasn't had a break yet, so she's a waitress?"

"You shouldn't stereotype, Chuck, but that's actually spot on. Penny is the dreamer in the family."

"Is she giving you any trouble?"

"None at all actually. She parties a lot, but she's not involved with drugs or anything like that. She used to have a lot of boyfriends though."

"Used to? Did she fell in love?"

"Yip, same as me. With a nerd."

Chuck fake pouted. "And what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, honey, it's kind of sweet. Penny never finished college and now she's got this thing for a scientist. She talks about Leonard all the time and once she actually tried to explain Schrodinger's cat to me."

"You didn't know about Schrodinger's cat?"

"Of course I did, but I didn't want to make her feel bad."

"So you have three sisters – Mary, Brandi and Penny."

"Yes."

"I'd like to meet them one day."

"I'm sure that can be arranged."

* * *

A/N – I know, this should probably be classified as sci-fi. And there are major plot holes with regards to the parents, but did any of you actually take this seriously?

How did this story come about apart from my earlier 'substance' abuse? Firstly, in the scene where Sarah goes into the locker room, gun drawn ('The cougars'), she bears a striking resemblance to Mary McCormack. Wishful thinking here, but if there's ever a need to have an older sister for Sarah on the show, I think Mary would be perfect. Secondly I had to pay tribute to The Big Bang Theory. Anything that can make you laugh that hard while you actually feel like hitting something deserves an award. And yes, Jim totally deserved his, he is absolutely brilliant.

Thank you for the responses to 'Covers' and subsequently 'Season 4' – of course now I'll have to write 24 episodes as opposed to 13, but how AWESOME is that! Congratulations to Josh, Chris, Zach, Yvonne and the rest of the cast and crew. I have high hopes for a season 5 too.

Disclaimers: I don't own Chuck. I don't own In Plain Sight. I don't own The Big Bang Theory.


End file.
